It takes a long time to make old friends, and for some of us, it can be really hard to make new ones, especially as we get older.
As an Empty Nester Mom who suddenly finds herself with more alone time, it’s time to rekindle those old friendships that may have been tossed aside during busy Mom life. This takes time and energy, but it’s important!
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How Many Friends Do You Need?
At this Empty Nester stage in your life, how many friends do you need…or want, for that matter?
Is there a certain number of friends that you’re happy having? Of course there’s no right or wrong answer, as it’s different for everyone.
What Types Of Friends Do You Need?
Have you ever thought about the roles your friends play in your life?
We all start out by being friends with everybody when we’re young—happily skipping around the playground, from the jungle gym to the swings and back.
As we get older, we tend to hone in on the friends who seem to genuinely care about us and, in turn, we care about. Those with whom we share interests, ones we find to be trustworthy, or those who are just plain fun to be around!
By the time we’re Empty Nesters, we’ve pared down our tribe, and are oftentimes left with certain types of friends, each serving a different purpose in our lives.
The six types of friends many Empty Nester Moms have are:
- Acquaintances
- Coffee/Lunch Friends
- Shopping Friends
- Work Friends
- Night Life Friends
- Best Friends
#1 Acquaintances
Acquaintences are ones that you chatted with from time to time—maybe at your kids’ school or in a gym during tournaments. No get-togethers, you just saw them occasionally around town and had some good small talk, usually about your kids. If you should bump into them now, the conversation is now about your adult kids!

#2 Coffee/Lunch Friends
Taking it up a notch, coffee/lunch friends are ones you get together with at your local coffee shop or restaurant for longer, deeper conversations.
#3 Shopping Friends
Shopping friends are those who share your love for browsing (or “gawking” as my husband calls it) at the mall, or hitting the streets looking for that hard-to-find item or a good sale.
#4 Work Friends
Work friends are those coworkers or managers with whom you have a good connection. You work well together to get the job done, and you enjoy sharing stories about each other’s families.
I remember my mom cautioning me: “You don’t have friends at work,” which has proven to be true in the manager/coworker relationship.
On the other hand, one of my best friends derived from a manager/manager relationship. We worked in different departments, but worked together on particular office-wide projects. While neither of us work there anymore, we’ve continued to get together occasionally over the past 40 years! On average, a dinner out together spans 4+ hours, to which my husband asks, “What can you possibly talk about for four hours?!”
#5 Night Life Friends
Night life friends are ones who are always willing to go with you to a lively restaurant, bar, or concert.
#6 BEST Friends
I would venture to say that your oldest friends are your best friends. They are for me, anyway.
Old friends are the ones who you’re super comfortable getting together with for any reason—coffee, shopping, a movie, dinner (with or without husbands), or for a girls’ trip!
I acquired a group of friends in early childhood—some of us have been friends since Kindergarten/Elementary School!
There were six of us friends who started going on occasional girls’ trips together. While having fun by the pool on one of our first trips, the bartender took notice and asked about our story. By day’s end, he gave us the nickname: “The Girly Girls,” and it stuck.
Sadly, we’ve lost two of our friends to cancer, way too soon! Take heed—it’s time to reconnect with your old friends and cherish your time with them—don’t wait!
While we haven’t been on a girls’ trip in a while, we have a group chat where we connect quite often, and occasionally see each other in person.
One of the Girly Girls is my lifelong VERY BEST friend with whom I share just about everything (whether she likes it or not!). When we get together, no matter how much time has passed, it seems that we pick up exactly where we left off. Not everyone has “that friend,” and I definitely feel blessed for it!
It takes a long time to make old friends—be sure to reconnect with them!
Why Old Friends Are Best
As noted earlier, at this stage of our lives, many of us have naturally pared down our friend circles. While you may have different types of friends—coffee buddies, work friends, or social companions—there’s something very unique about the friends who have been with you the longest.
Old friends know you deeply. They’ve seen your ups and downs, your quirks, and your milestones. They love and care for you and your family. They love you for who you are now, and for the person you’ve been all along. These are the friendships that provide unwavering support, comfort, and joy—the kind that withstands time and distance.
Reconnecting with old friends feels effortless. Conversations flow naturally, laughter comes easily, and even long gaps between visits don’t diminish the bond. At the end of the day, while all friendships have value, the reconnections with old friends are often the most meaningful—and the ones worth prioritizing.
How many different types of friends do you have in this stage of your life?
How do you make new friends now?
Leave a comment!
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